I’m at the end. The last big rush. The dark moment to the end of a very complicated book. I’m beginning to think that’s my author structure, to write very complicated. See, I’ve heard so often over the years: make sure your conflict will last an entire book. Don’t be afraid to heap misfortune on your characters.

I’ve seen often how that means give the h/h lots of little things to stumble over. Or even one defining life struggle, like with difficult parents or a personal tragedy. Sometimes this is written really well.  I hope I’ll fit in that sometimes category. Because the alternative; the look-my-h-or-h-is-a-real-live-person-with-issues-that-will-barely-be-dealt-with category is not one I want to be in.

I am fully confident in Betrayed. I took my time writing it and passed it through several readers, gained lots of feedback, it won absolutely awesome agent and then it went through lots more work with a freelance editor. I have confidence in that book.

I love Cinderella’s Shoe. But, I haven’t finished it, my agent and editor haven’t seen it, a few readers have read just over half of it and love it, but they loved Betrayed before it went through 9 revisions. So, am I confident in this story?

Not yet.  I think it’s great. I see it being great. But I don’t *know* it’s great. Isn’t the artistic  temperament funny? Am I arrogant, with an almost conceited belief that lots of people will love the story I want to share with them? Am I completely insecure and convinced no one will like it?

The short answer is: yes.

I am so close to the end of Cinderella’s Shoe, I can taste it!  It’s like riding the very fine edge of an orgasm.  Feels wonderful, but if it keeps taking so freakin’ long things are going to get really painful.  How many times can a person say, “Just a little more time, I need just a little more time!”

Well, I’ve got a bit of time. I stayed up until 4 am working on a difficult scene. Now i’m zooming through a really cool section that’s really about 3 scenes ahead of where I am, but it really helps to write a scene when I feel the most passionate about it. So, I’ve skipped ahead and then I’ll circle back and then do a read over and be on track for the ending, where I get to tie all kinds of threads.  :)  It’s an exciting process.

I just got through reading this and it was very cool. I like the premise with the Paladins and can’t wait to see what she’ll do with the Others. I especially want to learn more about Barak. And since no one who hasn’t read it won’t know what it’s about, or who these characters are so just go buy it and read it.

Okay, so book reviews aren’t my forte. I’ll leave it to the reviewing experts. LOL But, it was a very cool book and the beginning of an interesting new series.

Today I joined The Raven Vampire Nightclub at Yahoo. We’ll be having a big Online Party with lots of other authors, readers, interviews and prizes on Thursday, October 26th! You might want to check it out.

On this day 15 years ago, I accidentally showed up at my husband’s birthday party. Weird, I know. How do you accidentally go to someone’s birthday party? Well, I had just moved in with my aunt and didn’t have a key to her apartment. When she dropped me off at the football game my junior year, the agreement was to let my friend Amy drive me home.

Amy tried. She did. But in Spokane, October is a very chilly month. When I couldn’t get in the apartment, she took me with her to a birthday party I hadn’t been invited to. It turns out at least 30 of the other kids that showed hadn’t been invited, either.

I don’t know if you’ve ever heard of the movie Worm Eaters. It’s the worst B, or Z, rated film you’ll ever come across with women whose busts are bigger than their IQ jogging down the road, seeing a worm filled hot dog laying on the side walk, picking it up and eating it while they don’t notice worms wiggling from their mouths. Totally disgusting. That year Craig’s mom had decided to give him a themed birthday party, making spaghetti (the gummy worms in it melted) and a birthday cake with gummy worms in the middle. (The gummy worms worked here. When you cut a slice and pulled it away, a still glued together worm slid from the rest of the cake. It grossed even her out and she’d made it.)

One of the guys there loved the movie and sat, his long legs stretched out over half the floor, shoveling spoonful after spoonful of spaghetti into his mouth as he stared in horrified fascination at the movie.

To admit how totally shallow I was, the first thing I did after arriving was count the candles on his cake, 17, and hope sincerely that there wasn’t “one to grow on”. There wasn’t. He is legitimately 3 months older than I am. I couldn’t stand the thought of dating someone younger than me and boy did I want a boyfriend.

I wanted someone to hug me. Someone to hold me. Someone who was there for me. And someone I could love and care for. I needed this in the worst way, prayed for it with all my strength, and apparently God agreed. He sent me Craig.

I realize making you go to school on your birthday doesn’t make you feel very loved, baby, but I’ve never seen you work so hard on a project and you deserve the best grade on it. Happy Birthday, honey.

are wonderful!  I didn’t wake up with THE PERFECT SCENE in mind.  Even better.  I woke up with the desire to sit and type and see what popped up on the screen.  Is it any good?  We’ll see later.  It was a bit unexpected, but I think it will do well.  It’s not totally finished, but I wrote over 1000 words today.  If I can do that again tomorrow, I’ll be heading into the scenes I really do visualize.  Then 1000 words will be a drop in the bucket.  Yes, I alway look forward to those moments when I feel like I’ve accomplished the world and therefore every effort up to that isn’t quite enough.  So I’m a perfectionist.  Oh well.  At least I’ll go to bed happy tonight.